Talk:Guildmaster Pegasus/@comment-11555902-20140607235127/@comment-5049048-20140608112748

An important point to consider while creating a character's backstory is not whether to fill it with achievements- such is easy- but to fill it with story. A good story is often marked by how we see the protagonists struggle against fearsome opponents, secretive villains or murderous nature. I like to believe that this is one of the reasons why my own backstory- spanning several millennia- was accepted without a single complaint: it was a very good story.

And to be quite honest and blunt, the history told here looks like a series of recaps of roleplays: omitting details and overly simplifying actions at points. In effect, I recommend that you write the history again, this time in a format that actually is a story, or could be a novel.